An e-mail I came THIS close to sending to a client just to let her know what her micro-managing felt like.

TO: Luke Sullivan, Creative Director

FROM: Communications Manager

Please move the 56th pixel on the 233rd row about a 64th of a inch to the left. Also, the dot in the “I” should come down one font size, but not the lower vertical slash of the i, just the little dot on top of the i. The serif of the letter “k” is seems to be too big (am willing to discuss) but would like to see it both ways. Also, this is the second time I’ve asked about retouching the bottom two molecules of the lower 1/564th inch of the logo. It’s very “bland” and I’d like to see it the same way as presented to me in the pitch. The top of the two molecules is fine, but the lower molecules have atoms that are clearly not from our corporate palette. One last thing. The electrons in the outer shell of the lower atom are rotating counterclockwise. We talked about this already. Could we also see what it looks like when the electrons rotate clockwise, in time for today’s 3pm marketing meeting. For next week’s agenda: Now that the existence of the Higgs boson has been established, we will be able to help the agency make even finer improvements to the work.


  1. Luke, thanks for the best laugh I’ve had all week. 🙂

  2. The subject of client/agency dialogue will basically be the same in 30 years. That’s what I’m understanding. This humbles me, makes me laugh, and depressed at the same time.

  3. this should go viral.

  4. You hit this one out of the park.


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Luke Sullivan

Author, speaker, and ad veteran available to recharge, reinvigorate, and refocus marketing, advertising, and branding firms.

I give a hugely energetic series of presentations on innovation, creativity, branding, and marketing. I spent 32 years in the trenches of advertising (at agencies like Martin, GSD&M, and Fallon) and I’ve put everything I learned into my book, Hey Whipple, Squeeze This. But for me nothing beats taking the message out and speaking to living breathing audiences at clients, agencies, and conferences. You can book me on the button below.